It’s early morning and I’m trying to get enough coffee in me so that I can properly function. Apparently, I’ve never met that threshold but I keep trying nonetheless. My sweet Aunt Ruby came to spend the night with me last night so that she can be here with Mama so that I can help May at the farm. There are only a few short weeks before events start happening. Right now, I’m feeling like we are driving with blindfolds on at about 100 miles per hour. We don’t really know what we are doing but we are just winging it.
I don’t know if this is a business model that experts would recommend but everything seems to be falling into place just fine. We had a roadblock earlier in the week when we thought we would be blocked by a conservation easement. Fortunately, we did a little more research and were able to press on forward. It was just a little hiccup on the journey and I’m sure just the first of many.
In a few weeks, we will be hosting a writer’s retreat presented by published authors. I’m really excited about this opportunity, not just for the farm but also for my own writing journey. I’ve been stagnant and obstinate about finishing my book. I guess I thought maybe if I waited long enough, it would write itself but that’s just not going to happen. In between my real job, my hobby job, my actual hobbies, grocery shopping, and sleep, I will have to squeeze in the time to finish the book. Perhaps one day when I’m a fancy famous author, people will read this blog and wonder what in the world was I thinking?
Inspiration seems to wax and wane for me. I guess that’s the nature of the creative mind but I sure wish mine could stoke that fire a little more often. Or, perhaps it’s a matter of taking the time to sit down in front of the keyboard and get to work. I’m going to finish. One day. And, I hope that one day is very soon. People may not like it. People may not understand it. But it’s the baby I’ve been trying to birth since I was in the fourth grade after I discovered that I had a talent. I wrote a short story called, The Ancient City. It was about a group of archaeologists who discovered a long-buried African city and the characters were all based on my classmates. I will never forget that my teacher was so impressed that she couldn’t stop talking about it. My friends wanted to read more and know what happened next. I never added anything else to it but I would serve as the playground storyteller and the kids loved it. My current book is totally unrelated to my original piece but I think it has merit.
Perhaps inspiration can come in the most unlikely of places. Or, perhaps sometimes we just need a little bit of encouragement to see that something is indeed possible. When May first mentioned the farm project to me back in the fall of last year, I encouraged her to pursue it because it could be a wonderful way to keep the farm and earn an income. She was so encouraged that it seemed like nothing else worked out until she started working toward the dream she had. Despite a few minor hiccups and the minuscule budget, things are working out. I would never have dreamed a month ago that I would be planning a writer’s retreat with multiple published authors. All it took was just the courage to dream and the audacity to ask. Sometimes if we never ask, or we never try, the answer will always be no.
At first, when May met with me on a dreary and cold day in January, I was apprehensive for fear of promising something that I couldn’t deliver. We’ve teased about putting the lipstick on a pig and just running with it. But, if we never try, we’ll never know. Regrets are not my forte and certainly not anything I’m interested in having. Some call us crazy for even trying and some say that it is too enormous of a feat to do on our own. That’s where the naysayers are wrong. May is a red-headed fire ball and I am the perpetual dreamer, and occasional optimist. Noah didn’t question God when he was told to build the Ark. He just did it. I’ve asked for guidance for my life and how I can reframe my vision. God knows my heart to be a writer and perhaps the path for me to fulfilling that dream is down a wooded path at Red Dog Farm, however unconventional that may be.
Messpot Diaries 