Revenge can be so tempting. The urge to hurt those that hurt us can be so overwhelming, especially when people kick us at our most vulnerable. I’ve been there. I’ve wanted to have the last ugly word, the last snarly laugh, and the last dig. I’ve wanted to give people an ounce of the mess they’ve tried to throw my way. But, I can’t. I can’t stand to see people hurt, no matter how bad they’ve hurt me.
The Bible gives us the best advice when it tells us to turn the other cheek. But, does that verse mean what we think it means? I’ve read it all my life and once thought it meant that by turning the other cheek, I was just turning away from the evil. That’s not what it means. In Matthew 5:38 the verse begins, ““You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’ But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also. And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well.” Wait, what?
God, you want me to offer up my other cheek after they’ve already slapped the first one? My human instinct says that’s a big no. In fact, my human instinct want me to slap their cheek, too. Being obedient to God, and His will for our lives, often means that we have to deny our human instinct and love like Jesus. Remember Him? The man who was crucified, the man who was beaten, yet still chose love.
Whew. Love is not easy to give to the people who hurt us most but love is so very necessary to live a life reflective of God and one in which we can achieve peace. We can focus on all the reasons why we’re going to “get back” at someone or we can let it go. Let it fall like sand flowing and filtering between our fingers, blowing loose in the wind. Let. It. Go. The battle is not yours, or mine, or anyone else’s but God.
Oh, but God. Won’t He do it? God can turn a broken mess into a golden cloth. He can weave the fabric when we don’t even know how to sew. But there is one necessary component to this miraculous work. We have to let go. We have to let go of the repressed (or not so repressed) feelings of hatred, anger, distrust, or whatever ugly seeds of evil are holding us back. Forgive. God will deal with those who’ve hurt you. Again I say, that battle is not yours. It’s not mine. Only God can wholly address those who hurt, those who lie, and those who steal. We may never see that happen and we have to be ok with that. God will handle their hearts with the same loving kindness that he does with ours.
That is the same grace we all want. Humans are imperfect and we all need a little grace from time to time. I’ve put my foot in my mouth and said something hurtful more times than I’d ever like to admit. I’ve done stupid things that have ended up hurting people. We are ALL guilty of hurting someone, no matter how much that wasn’t our intent. We ALL want the kind of grace God gives but we have to be willing to extend it.
Forgiveness is not an easy task, especially when the hurt runs deep and the confusion is abundant. I don’t know why people have hurt me in the past. I don’t know what is going on in their heart or their mind. I can only hope that they didn’t wake up that day with the objective to hurt me. But even if they did, my job is to relinquish control to God and let Him battle on my behalf. I have to step back, be kind, be still, and let God be God. I’d much rather be remembered as the girl who didn’t fight than the girl who loved to repay evil with evil.
When we choose to let the battle become our own, it consumes us. We can’t think of anything but how we’ve been hurt or how we can hurt someone. It eats at us like a parasite, consuming us from the inside out. Once the ugly parts start to show, it spirals out of control and evil will repay evil. If our intent is to hurt another person just because we can, we are no better than those who’ve hurt us.
Turn the other cheek, offer it up. Let them. Let them be who they will be so that God can be God. So what if they’re out there telling vicious lies about you? So what if they’ve worked against you behind your back? So what if they’ve been a friend to your face and a foe to your back? What happens is that when people can’t see the reaction out of you, they won’t keep doing it. There’s no reward for them if you’re not reacting. They want to be able to point the finger at how you’re reacting so that you can be the bad guy. Let them try, and show them grace. Something really special happens when you choose the path of grace and love versus the path of hate and resistance. Surprise those who seek to do you wrong by showering them with grace. You’ll find that the cheek that hasn’t been slapped isn’t so appealing anymore. And, even if it is, the battle isn’t yours.
God is a restorative God. What we may lose when we are hurt, God will restore. He will bring it back to us but even better. No, we may not see a roadmap that tells us exactly how He’s going to do it or when He’s going to do it but rest assured, He will. The temptation to slap a fool who’s being a fool will still be there. I am not saying that it will be easy to resist that temptation. You may grit your teeth until you think they’re going to break. The devil wants us to break and choose evil. The devil wants us to repay evil with more evil because then evil wins. When we choose grace and love, we choose to be restored. We choose peace and we choose to do the right thing. It sure doesn’t feel right when we’re in the midst of the storm but I can assure you that God will make it right. He will make it more than right. We have to take our hands and mouths off the situation and learn to be ok with the fact that the battle is His. And His alone.
Messpot Diaries 